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Sunday, July 9th, 2006
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3:09 pm
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| Thursday, June 15th, 2006
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10:25 pm
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why not?
1) smoked
2) consumed alcohol
3) slept in the same bed with someone of the opposite sex
4) slept in the same bed with someone of the same sex
5) made out with someone of the opposite sex
6) had sex
7) had someone in your room of the opposite sex
8) watched porn
9) bought porn
10) done drugs
TOTAL: 6
11) taken pain killers
12) taken someone else's prescription medicine
13) lied to your parents
14) lied to a friend
15) snuck out of the house
16) done something illegal
17) cut yourself
18) hurt someone
19) wished someone to die
20) seen someone die
TOTAL: 6
21) missed curfew
22) stayed out all night
23) eatin a carton of ice cream by yourself
24) been to a therapist
25) been to rehab
26) dyed your hair
27) recieved a ticket
28) been in an accident
29) been to a club
30) been to a bar
TOTAL: 7
31) been to a wild party
32) seen the Mardi Gras
34) had a spring break in Florida
35) sniffed anything
36) wore black nail polish
37) wore arm bands
38) wore t-shirts with band names
39) listened to rap
40) own 50 cent cd
TOTAL: 4
41) dressed gothic
42) dressed prep
43) dressed punk
44) dressed grunge
45) stole something
46) been too drunk to remember anything
47) blacked out
48) fainted
49) had a crush on your neighbor
50) had someone sneak into your room
TOTAL: 8
51) snuck into some one else's room
52) had a crush on your best friend's significant other
53) been to a concert
54) dry humped someone
55) been called a slut
56) called someone a slut
57) installed speakers in your car
58) broke a mirror
59) showered at someone of the opposites sex's house
60) brushed your teeth with someone elses toothbrush
TOTAL: 6
61) consider ludacris your favorite rapper
62) seen an R rated movie in theaters
63) cruised the mall
64) skipped school
65) had an eating disorder
66) had an injury
67) gone to court
68) walked out of a resteraunt without paying
69) caught something on fire
70) lied about your age
TOTAL: 8
71) owned an apartment
72) cheated on your boyfriend/girlfriend
73) cheated with someone
74) got in trouble with the police
75) talked to a stranger
76) hugged a stranger
77) kissed a stranger
78) rode in the car with a stranger
79) been sexually harrassed
80) been verbally harrassed
TOTAL: 5
81) met face to face with someone you met online
82) stayed online for 12 hours straight
83) talked on the phone for more than 4 hours straight
84) watched tv for 12 hours straight
85) been to a fair
86) been called a bad influence
87) cursed
88) prank called someone
89) laid in the bed with someone of the opposite sex
90) cheated on a test
TOTAL: 9
91) cheated on homework
92) held hands with someone of the opposite sex
93) been pushed into a pool
94) played pool
95) watched 5 hours of mtv straight
96) had a crush on someone 8 years older than you
97) had a crush on someone younger than you
98) wear eyeliner
99) skinny dipped
100) laughed at someone who was seriously hurt
TOTAL: 8
GRANDE TOTAL...67/100
current mood:  tired
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(comment on this)
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10:08 am
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why do i constantly think about this....and it doesnt make sense...one minute its a number i can handle ( i mean im never happy but can handle it) the next its a number i have never seen before and honestly its not fair. i didnt even do anything different really....its really not fair...i hate this....before europe i will be happy with this...
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(1 comment | comment on this)
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| Thursday, May 4th, 2006
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6:45 pm
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| Saturday, April 22nd, 2006
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7:38 am
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So to cure a bad day I laid out in the sun, painted my toe nails, went to then gym, went in the sauna, swam laps, and then went to sit in the Jacuzzi...Chocolate was mixed throughout these events. Now I thought my bad day was over but then i realized last night, I dont really think there is a cure for a bad mood or bad day, yes these things helped but the only cure was the clock saying 12, me realizing it was another day and then closing my eyes to go to sleep. Anyways, that just had to be said.
Today I have a speech tournament for my speech class.....and then I think the Gustorfs are going to be here and I am going to see them....and then I who knows where the nights takes me....probably my bed :)
love you all!
current mood:  satisfied
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(1 comment | comment on this)
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| Friday, April 7th, 2006
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9:27 pm
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Ever had the days where you just want to melt away
Ever had the days where you just want to melt away
Breathing was hard for me today
Reliving the past just as it had once been
Reliving the past just as it had once been
Every corner I turn my heartbreaks again
Ever had the days where you just want to melt away
Ever had the days where you just want to melt away
Breathing was hard for me today
Pinned between a boulder and life, I struggle for a breath
How can life be like this, how can life be like this
My day was such a mess
Ever had the days where you just want to melt away
Ever had the days where you just want to melt away
Breathing was hard for me today
Sick to my stomach I made it through the day
Sick to my stomach I made it through the day
I Crawl in my bed and cry my blues away
Ever had the days where you just want to melt away
Ever had the days where you just want to melt away
Breathing was hard for me today
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(comment on this)
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| Wednesday, April 5th, 2006
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5:27 pm
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so i need to know how to get a guy....like seriously people i need advice, anything...i will take any suggestions. thank you
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(4 comments | comment on this)
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| Sunday, April 2nd, 2006
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10:44 pm
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Alright I swear I will do a big update this week, tomorrow is my last stressful day for awhile as far as school goes....However, I just had the best most exhilirating weekend of my life. I did get caught in trees, almost choked, almost drowned, and my feet were purple, but it was the best thing ever! Wait for the next update or call me to find out everything cause I cant wait to share :)
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(comment on this)
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| Saturday, March 11th, 2006
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9:47 pm
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| Friday, February 17th, 2006
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2:03 pm
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Alright who is good with computers? Because mine is being stupid. It is not letting me go to a select few websites like my bank account, kodak, or my school websites...all which i have to put in a password so i am guessing it has to do with security settings or something but i have no idea....ANYONE.....HELP???? THANKS
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(1 comment | comment on this)
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| Friday, February 3rd, 2006
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2:45 pm
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I have just spent the last hour and a half looking up grad schools. Yes you heard me correctly GRADUATE SCHOOLS. my question to you is, i just go to this damn school how can I already be looking for another one. I mean graduate school = adult, and I am in no way an adult. THIS IS SO STRESSFUL!
current mood:  stressed
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(comment on this)
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| Wednesday, February 1st, 2006
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7:54 pm
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I'm so confused: I went to my counselors yesterday and i could graduate at the end of next year if i took 18 units next year, one summer class, and only majored in Child Development. But if I double majored i will be going to undergraduate school for like 4 1/2 years, plus graduate school. The other option is minoring in Psychology and majoring in Child Development. That way I could graduate in 4 years exactly. But im not sure if I would get into a great graduate school if I just did one major. Minoring would definately help me though. I am so confused, I have to go to a good graduate school to get my MFT but now double majoring seems like a waste of money and time.
Boys are really really confusing too!
Other than that I am loving this semester. I love my classes except speech. Have cute guys in tons of classes, a cute TA, and think i might do really well in them too.
Sasha is really really sick. Katie is in her new apartment and I am having so much fun lounging around and babysitting.
I decided I am going to make this the best semester ever. Sasha and I are going on an Adventure outings, we are going River Rafting!!!!! I'm very excited. And i am going to volunteer for a weekend hopefully, at a national forest.
I can't believe its February! My birthday is in 25 more days and I have decided that 20 is going to be my best year yet. It is the start of my twenties.... and everyone says the twenties are the best years of your life. I can't wait!
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(1 comment | comment on this)
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| Tuesday, January 24th, 2006
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9:24 pm - Mexico
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Alright so Sidney sent me a nudge to update so hear i go:
Mexico was amazing. Without a doubt it was the most amazing experience of my life. I went down there a little unsure but my roommate Sasha went with me and I knew a bunch of people but I was still nervous. We left on Sunday at 4 in the morning and got to Vincete Guerreo at like 10. We ate at this place called Papa Reubens that fed us this insane us amount of homemade food. They were the best Quesotacos I have ever had in my life. Monday we got into our groups and met our families. Our familia had 4 children (Eber 1 ; Raquel 5; Manuel 8; and Laura 11) and then a mom Rosalia and a Dad. There uncle also lived on this property that consisted of 7 chickens, one shack that was a kitchen with no electricity or stove, one other shack where all the parents and kids slept and another shack where the uncle slept and finally a stinky outhouse. The first day we built all four walls and started the roof. I have never worked so hard in my life. The children were so cute and helped us nail and everything. It is so different to see a 5 year old with a hammer and no one caring. The children did things that American children would never be allowed to do and Eber would always put nails in his mouth but not once did any of the children cry or get hurt. That night we all went down to the beach and the freshmen boys set off fireworks. It was so funny they had know idea what they were doing and set up this huge firework and they had know idea what kind of firework it was and so the lit it and ran and it started going off and then it fell over and starte shooting at the crowd. Everyone started running and falling in the sand and the fireworks were shooting over us, it was so funny like in a movie. The next day we got the roof up and we started painting. The painting seemed endless but Lisa and I did a good job. We even painted the inside of the house for the mom. She picked a burnt red color which looked really good and was unusual for Mexico because they usually choose bright horrible colors. Wednesday I played Soccer with the children on this open field that overlooked the ocean and had rolling hills in the background. This was such a gorgeous sight. These children have nothing compared to our standards yet there riches are in the land and family. This land in California would be like millions of dollars. Anyways, the mom and dad were inside all morning and then they brought out homemade tamalis. She had prepared like over 30 tamalis for 8 of us and they had killed one of their chickens for us. They were the best things i have had ever tasted and made with so much love. No one has ever sacrificed a chicken for me. That night we went to a Christian Drug Rehab Center. It was amazing. THese Christian men sang their hearts out while praising God and then two people from the rehab place and two people from our group gave Testimonies. This one man gave a testimony in Spanish and there were translators but his testimony brought me to tears. It was just so amazing to see how God touches so many people and no matter who you are or what language you speak, he will change your path if you let him. Thursday we finished the house and dedicated the house to our Family. We provided our family with a Stove and a bunk bed. Our family had never had a stove before. We also gave our family clothes and photo album of pictures that we had taken all week. When the mom saw this she started crying. This could be the only time in their lives where they will have pictures of themselves!! It was so emotional and the mom and dad hugged me and told me to come back anytime. I know that they will be in my memories forever and I will be in theirs too! Friday I went to this Orphanage which was fabulous and then we went shopping and to the beach! Saturday we left at 7:30 and I finally got back in Chico at 10:30 so it was a long, long day, but totally worthwhile. I know this is long but I didnt wanna leave anything out! Love you all!
current mood:  okay
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(2 comments | comment on this)
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| Saturday, December 17th, 2005
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9:54 am
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| Tuesday, December 13th, 2005
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9:22 am
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It's finals week. I am so stressed, I cried in the shower tonight. I hate this feeling. Feeling like your not good enough, not pretty enough, not wild enough, it sucks. Lately i have been getting comments like, wow thats so un-karen like, or you wouldn't make-out with them anyways so why does it matter or you wouldn't like it. I hate these comments i dont get them, I have a 3.5 GPA, i am very active in my youth group, i am friends with everyone, i volunteer all the time in chico and at home, i like to think i am nice, i work out, i party, as we all know i flirt with boys, so i what makes people think they are better than me. I am not saying I am perfect (cause we all know my flaws) or better than others but i really don't get why getting drunk and making out with boys, or not going to classes, or smoking makes people better than me? I really don't understand that...cause I am pretty sure I could do all those things to, I just don't like too and dont feel i should have to, to feel accepted and part of my groups. We all know I have done wild things...epecially this year in chico, but I don't get why if I want to thats not ok? I don't look down on people for doing things i dont think are right, I still listen to the stories and problems and pray for all of you...
I am going to Italy next year...its for sure...well I applied and went to the meetings...so its pretty much for sure...i realized how excited I actually am the other day, I will get to be somebody different than everyone knows me as.. I will not be going with anyone and I can act how I want, meet knew people, see how christians in europe worship, go to bars, make-out with anyone i want and the only way people will know is if I choose to tell them.
These last couple weeks Sasha and I have gotten a lot closer. I love how we go to youth group together and church, but we also will drink together! I talk about boys and she gives me her opinion...even Nick is warming up to her which is nice...cause hes becoming a part of my life as a friend and i want us all to hang out... We have had so many talks lately about everything especially weight and me working out so much. I don't know, I have never really talked to people about that before....
Alot of my friends are seniors and they all go to the bars and are getting ready to graduate. I am jealous I think because I want to do that to! I want to have a boy, and go dancing at clubs...i am like a little girl when they tell their stories haha i just sit and listen with wide eyes haha
I miss home, i miss the baby, and friends, and my daddy and mom,
I am going on another ride along again with Glenn and his partner...I am really excited...haha maybe we will pick a hottie in a gang, ha that would surprise people me dating a gang member...knowing me i would be like lets go to counseling and dont get a gun haha
well i have biology final tomorrow that will be the death of me so thats it for now...sorry for rambling and if you read this all your my new best friend :)
current mood: stressed
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(2 comments | comment on this)
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| Monday, December 12th, 2005
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6:38 am
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For people taking Finals this week.... Always remember to take a SWAG....SOPHISTICATED WILD-ASS GUESS! Just thought i would pass that on.. I hate finals so i decided to boycott studying tonight and go see Narnia!
current mood: blah
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(comment on this)
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| Saturday, December 10th, 2005
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11:50 am
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Alright so I am sitting in my living room on a Saturday night watching tv and writing a paper while my 3 best friends are all getting drunk together and having fun. This makes me:
a) jealous
b) sad
c) frustrated
d) pissed off
e) lonely
That is all i am going to say about that
current mood:  grumpy
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(3 comments | comment on this)
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| Friday, December 9th, 2005
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11:55 am
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I just spent the last hour reading past livejournal entries and trying to get them in some format so I can print them out and put them in a journal. I have realized that I have not written since the beginning of the year and so many things have happened this semester that it seems sad they have not been recorded. Hopefully, after finals next week I will be able to a big update and write about this semester. So get ready girls, My Livejournals are coming Back :)....I know you girls are thrilled!
Anyways Last year I did a Journal about the guys I would sleep with and I found it funny reading it tonight so I am going to do it again but just the top 10:
1. Nick
2. Matthew McConaughey
3. Collin Firth
4. JASON LEWIS
5. Dermot whoever(the guy from My Best Friends Wedding)
6. Jude Law
7. George Clooney?
8. Brad Pitt
9. Ewan McGregor
10. Phantom of the Opera guys - Both :)
K, now is it sad that only one of those guys i know? And honestly i just put him down so I could say I would know one of them? Hmmm oh well, Girls i love you!
current mood: tired
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(5 comments | comment on this)
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| Thursday, October 20th, 2005
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11:05 pm
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So do you ever wonder how people feel about you? Not like the superficial stuff like do they think your cute or like your hair but how they really feel. Do they care, do they love you? Would they come to your funeral because they felt obligated or because they really cared and our terrified of life without you. And what if you care for someone more than they care about you? I dont like that. I dont wanna care/love someone more I want it to be equal. Haha I know I am a brat but I do. And I want there to be like a care-o-meter and I just know exactly how people feel and how much they value me so I can know how much i should allow myself to care for them. Wow I sound so dumb but this is how I am feeling. Does anyone else ever feel like this? Anyways, Girls I love you all very much and I can't wait till we are all together. LOVE YOU!
current mood:  confused
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(1 comment | comment on this)
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| Thursday, September 29th, 2005
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11:59 pm
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why am i so afraid?
but really if he is the perfect guy would i be afraid?
is fear standing in the way of my happiness or just telling me that he isnt the right one?
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(1 comment | comment on this)
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